Thirteen Years…

Today is my 13th anniversary. That isn’t really a special number, but it has been a special year for us. This year I figured out that Nice Guy was a dysfunction, not a compliment. That has changed my entire perspective on how I am supposed to be handling my half of our relationship.

After 13 years, there is the natural tendency to start getting bored. Our situation has worked out better than that, though. Our youngest child is in school this year; so on days when I don’t have to be out, we get to spend the day together. I work on paperwork and we catch up on our favorite shows on tv. Sometimes, she goes with me on my work calls and keeps me company while I’m on the road all day.

The alpha concept has also changed the way we interact in our sex life. I’m understanding that it is not only acceptable, but encouraged, to state what I want. My openness has led to increased openness on her end as well. We are talking about things that were never open to discussion in the past. Our foundation of trust and good communication have given us the strength to explore each other in ways we never expected.

But it isn’t really about sex. Well, okay, yes it is, but isn’t all about sex. We are more in tune with our shared goals and expectations across the board. We are working on not being complacent with our time. We’re working on being more active in our day to day life which can be hard sometimes with three children.

After 13 years, it feels like we are still just getting started. That is a heck of feeling.

So what did we do today? Well, my primary love language is quality time and hers is touch. So we spent the morning lounging around the living room and catching up on tv shows. Then after lunch, we screwed like newly weds until it was time to get the kids. Because that’s how you spend your anniversary when you live in a rural area and can’t get a babysitter.

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